New Blessings; New Lessons; New Pain; New Growth

I was going to start this blog with something along the lines of

I’ve been back a little over two weeks and already I desperately need a holiday . . . .

In the typical British way of complaining about the circumstances we are in (for example when there’s no sun – it’s cold – when there is sun  – it’s hot!) but then Eph 5:20 came to mind; to paraphrase give praise to God no matter what! Why you might ask? Well because he is in sovereign control of every circumstance!

The first few days back were rough, I seemed to find temptation at every turn and it hurt, failing and falling into sin can feel great for a minute, but then the realisation that those few minutes of sinful pleasure cost Jesus, our Lord, Saviour and Redeemer HIS LIFE and that we need to be covered by HIS BLOOD cut in and it’s time to cry out to Go in anguish and seek forgiveness. Thankfully God the Father is merciful and Jesus has covered the price for every one of our sins!

Problem: Due to the [insert misguided; delusional; aggressive] political protests in Bangkok which have seen transport bombed, police shot and a HOSPITAL INVADED Hong Kong Uni have decided not to send volunteers. This leaves me 43 teachers short in more than 25 schools and thousands of kids disappointed. Same day I was hoping for some money and it didn’t come. Queue feelings of anxiousness and frustration (normally) but praise God the night before I had been reading Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges, which actually deals with this. OK I’m not perfect and this was stress provoking for a couple of hours but hen I prayed and lifted it into God’s hands. RESULT? A few days later we’ve got a plan for about 10 volunteers to come out and teach at the most needy schools, some money has arrived and I’m happy painting away in classrooms. PRAISE GOD!

Problem: My new teacher training course is about to start and I don’t have confirmed students. The head teacher wants names and numbers and most students are awaiting other results. My 3 brightest students are all offered alternative places. I have just bought 10 computers at an investment of 170,000 Baht. As I slowly work down my list I begin to realise that things are not going well. Options: worry or pray for God’s sovereign hand to rule. Take PRAYER! Result: 12 students confirmed, 3 spare places for anyone who accepts late and I’m not stressed! PRAISE GOD!

Problem: School curriculum. We had a meeting in January to decide the curriculum. Most NGO’s and foreign *experts* strongly advise against doing GED. Head teacher wants to do GED. I argue against it. Loose. Option: Teach something that for 5 months I’ve said I won’t or leave? Then I read the Bible and remember that Jesus was a servant. He submitted to the Father’s will. If you want to be a disciple of Jesus then you are to serve, not push to be first (paraphrased from Matthew 20 and 21). PRAISE GOD FOR TRANSFORMING MY STUBBORN WILL AND DESIRES INTO A DESIRE TO SERVE NO MATTER WHAT!

Problem: Whilst painting a Canadian guy comments on the instability of the rickety table I was standing on. I laugh and shrug it off as irrelevant as I’m in Thailand. One hour later it falls; I fall and the paint falls. RESULT? I’m hurt and literally on my knees in pain (I’m still bruised over a week later!) My hair is a lovely shade of green and I have to walk past dozens of people to take a quick shower. PRAISE GOD I LEARNT A LITTLE HUMBLENESS!

This is just a snap shot of some of the problems I’ve faced in the last couple of weeks since coming back. I’ve left out the entrance exam for Grade XI, marking papers till 3am and writing Bible verses on my wall at 1am to remind me of God’s promises. I’ve also left out God’s amazing faithfulness in bringing me back into a loving home church (that I had thought was cancelled) and the way I can see him working in people’s lives; more of that next time if I get some free time!

Be joyful always. Pray continually. Give thanks in all circumstances for this is God’s will for you.                     1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Update on the money that was raised last year and how it was spent

Click on the link below for a two page pdf leaflet including information on:

What was riased

How it was spent

My current plans

Future Needs

Fundraising Update

Central to me

This blog entry is a little bit different, as rather than focusing on what I’ve been doing, I’m going to focus on me, specifically the most important feature of my life, my faith in God.

I feel moved to write this entry for two reasons, God to me is central to everything that I am and do, and also today has been a wonderful day which has really helped to lift me spiritually. To all of you reading this, whether Christian or non-Christian, please think about what I’m saying, as I believe faith in the TRUE God is the single most important thing you can have. I hope non-believers will understand my God better and believers may be challenged or encouraged by this.

This week has been especially challenging for a number of reasons including a meeting, which was held on Tuesday, which discussed options for next year. There were some very different ides put forward which I think would un do all the hard work put in so far and so at next week’s meeting there will be some tough discussions. It did send me into a little quandary- if these changes are forced forward, could I stay and teach still? I don’t know. But I’ve been praying about this a lot and God has sent me 2 verses of scripture 3 times in the last 3 days so I’m guessing that’s my answer (Jer 17:7-8).

Since I arrived here I’ve struggled to go to church regularly as the only English Service is on a the same time as my Sunday school class. This has been difficult as I really value the instruction of a preacher and the encouragement that can be sought from being in relationship with other believers, however last night at a fellowship group a guy mentioned a house church that had meeting every Sunday afternoon. I went today and it was AMAZING! A real Spirit filled church, full of JOYFUL worship, teaching and time for fellowship and mutual encouragement. I really can’t express how happy this made me, being in God’s presence and receiving communion for the first time since May. I felt very emotional as I was reminded of the sacrifice that God made, but also joyful as I drank the wine, symbolising being washed clean and made righteous by the blood of Jesus Christ!

A real positive this week has been the coming to faith of one of my students. He admitted a couple of days ago that he had woke up in the middle of the night, knowing that Christ was real and he then gave his whole heart to Him. I ropy that this initial enthusiasm does not die when he goes back to his parents. He said that he had watched my behaviour and liked it. He had seen the changes in me since before I was a Christian, he talked about my stopping smoking and drinking and also how we can come to the throne of God and ask for anything, big or small.

A real low was earlier today. One of my students wanted me to go into a boxing ring with him however I’m not comfortable with this. The bible teaches us to love, to be meek, to be gentle and to turn the other cheek. I’m not sure how trying to cause someone else pain fits in with this but he didn’t accept the argument. Unfortunately one of his main reasons for this was me. He sees how I act with people in class and challenged me what was the difference from me hitting a student to someone playing football to another playing boxing. Whilst the comparison to football I felt was a little stretched, clearly there is no difference between me hitting a student and two people boxing and it saddened me to realise how I had affected him. I know that I, like all Christians, am still a sinner but this was a second reminder that others are watching and following. This to me is a big challenge to be careful how I act and speak at ALL times.

So to summarise I would like to make two points. God listens and answers prayers, in the most wonderful and unexpected ways. Two. What we do really does affect others, sometimes positively and sometimes negatively and we should all be aware of this.

CHRISTmas, New Year and thoughts on 2009

Before Christmas Eve I had decided that I wanted to surprise the kids who were here and so had bought marsh mellows and little fruit jellies, thinking I would leave them in each room with a Christmas verse but on the 24^th I saw that they had all left their socks hanging in the hall and so perfect was the opportunity to play Santa!

However I now know how hard it is to be quiet! A couple of times I heard a noise and ran away very quickly, trying not to be discovered, however I should have guessed – it was another two teachers with the same idea. They were both laughing having seen me run away twice. Later on another teacher popped along, just as I’d finished breaking into the nursery dorm and leaving tangerines next to each mosquito net!

I must also add that the students are muppets! I had to climb on top of speakers to get to some socks and others were well hidden in dark corners, in the tree and behind the white board! If anyone got left out I’m sorry. All should have had a tangerine, marshmallows, jellies, chewies and a snack bar/coffee sachet. The kids were thrilled from what I saw (thought I wasn’t exactly jumping out if bed with delight when the kids started singing at 5:30, having only been in bed 2 and a half hours!) It really was delightful though to see their faces. I’m not sure how many kids would be so happy with so little in England but here they loved it and I really felt that the true spirit of Christmas was with each of them!

New Years Eve was also fun. As each group of Christians like to celebrate Christmas on a different day so that they can invite everyone else, we celebrated on the 31^st. We danced in the morning, then had breakfast of chicken, lunch of beef (kidney, liver and intestine the night before) and tea of pork and leftovers! There was a ‘marathon’ in the afternoon – about a 5km run. I said no but as the little kids ran off I ended up following (much to the amusement of everyone who watched 20 10-year olds beat me, though I still claim I gave them a good start!) and after that there was no way I was joining in the real competition for my age group!

The night was amazing.  Talent show was organised, all were given presents and prizes for various tings and we celebrated until 10 minutes before midnight, when the pastor came and we had a short service.

On that note December has been great for spreading the message of Christ and I’m hoping that my one on one ministries will be starting again soon (they’ve been cancelled for various reasons).

It has been an amazing year. To go from taking the very first steps in A Christian journey to now working in ministry and teaching. I started as a student, opened a college level school and I’m working as a teacher. I started as a smoker and but stopped nearly a year ago. Most importantly in everything I’ve seen God shaping me and helping me. Yes I do still struggle, in so many ways, but I know that God is not only my saviour, he’s my father and he will continue to help me and lead me. In him I have the utmost faith and so THANK YOU to everyone who helped to lead me to where I am today!

midnight dog; singing and dancing

This has really been a very special month!

Throughout the month we have been dancing – lots of practise every night and from 9am till 5pm on Saturdays. We danced for Dr Cyntha Maung’s birthday, Karen New Year, Christmas celebration (on the 31^st December) and next month is also World Children’s Day (not to mention random private performances for special guests!)

 

One session I was late for, having been talking to the headteacher! I was punished, along with the dance teacher who was also late! We had to dance (just 3 of us) for the guests!

December is also a very special here. The Karen celebrate the whole month – it’s called sweet December! We’ve been carol singing most nights. Two nights stand out in particular, one in which we were still knocking on people’s doors at 1am to sing them 3 songs (by the time they had woken up and got dressed they usually only made it outside for the Goodbye song!) and I was asked for a solo – TWICE the first time I managed to dance instead but the second time I had to sing before the Doctor would hand over her donation! The second night that stands out is when Tee Dah, a very kind, respected man who lives in the same building as me, also requested a solo and I ended up sinning a Karen song by myself! Just in case you’re wondering NO I cannot speak Karen yet but I can sing a few songs in Karen now!

That night was also special because on the way home we spotted some road kill. There was a delicious dead dog on the side of the road near the entrance to the school and so three of us crept back and picked it up, then ran though the local village with it with a whole pack of dogs chasing (probably the dead dog’s family!). Midnight dog is SOOOO good, though I was surprised that only the stomach got thrown away. EVERYTHING else was chopped up and thrown in, even the head. Later two kids were sharing it and I was told the cheeks were very delicious! I stick to the rest of the dog like liver, kidney, intestine, lung and meat/bone!

new year

final part

Final part of a series of blogs which ended up being a bit more than a week, due to internet and other things that keep coming up.

 

These last few months have been amazing, its not always fun as im sure youll have realised from the blogs, but I know that this is where that Im supposed to be, that this is Gods plan for me at the moment and that there are so many people here who I love and desperately want to help.

 

One moment of pure joy happened yesterday. One of my grade 12 students joined this year from another school and hed said it was because of the teaching which hed heard about. Yesterday he showed me a picture of me and him last august when id been volunteering at the local clinic. I vaguely remember him as being a talented students but having taught nearly 500 students in the last year I didnt really remember him. Hed remembered me though and Id clearly made an impression on him which was an amazing gift to me, to see the value that education has to the kids. (ok probably doesn’t make sense but im not good at explaining feelings and thoughts!)

 

I love the students, especially grade xi. At the start of the year I dreaded teaching them, due to the vast array of abilities. Now I love it, because they all try so hard. And each of them as a special, unique place in my heart. Some are just great guys to have fun with and act like a kid again, others care so much hat they always want to help, all of them burst into a smile when I see them (except one, but then he smiles occasionally and that’s really special!)

 

I finished writing the grade xii text book this week and now have a history text book written on germany for grade xi and America for grade 12. Hopefully that’s the last major textbook I need to write for a while, although im sure there will be plenty of revisions done in the future.

 

These last few days ive held a writing camp for grade 11 and 12 wanting to improve. 14 were invited and 8 came, which is fine, many were in Burma and didn’t want to leave their families until after the weekend. Considering that they don’t see their families for 3-4 months at a time this is not exactly unexpected. Those that did come were great. They got involved and even the smallest girl had fun during the animal game: evolution, which was funny as usually you cannot hear her but she was totally relaxed yesterday and seemed to enjoy acting out the actions and noises. All the students seem to grow so much in confidence, I just hope that this will continue for the next 18 months until they graduate!

 

theres so much that i want to share but i cant, im just not able to put the memories and feelings into written words, and so many photos which i want to share – but i dont want to sit here for hours uploading them and im not convinced it would be safe to do so anyway, but ill leave you with this and hope to pick up the blog again when i get a break from teaching!

 

6: the other side to work here

End of another long day – and this is supposed to be a holiday! I collapsed last night onto the floor at about 8.30am and slept soundly!

 

Been teaching a writing camp today for my grade xi students. Originally it was planned for 14 of them but only 8 showed up, not surprisingly some had forgotten and some were till in Burma, however those that were there seemed to understand the basics that we were going over.

 

 

In between teaching this (while they were writing) ive been no the internet trying to search out some new leads for possible funding. The BMWEC is a great organisation with established procedures in place that in theory fits what many foundations want – the snag is they don’t like unsolicited requests. Those that do seem to be unable to take on any more projects in the current economic climate.

 

Thanks goes out to the people who sent donations for the IDP teachers. There is now enough money to give them a second stipend. There are also promising noises which suggest a longer term deal may be able to start form next June so fingers crossed there. That will leave them without a stipend at the end of the year and im looking to fund raise a little money for that (£800).

 

Ive spent a considerable amount of time today writing to children’s book publishers who welcome requests for books and hope that some may respond positively. If so the library at HTL may be improved and possibly a library started at TMK. Im also tempted to look at a book collection back in the UK with a view to shipping them out march next year when I get back which would hopefully mean they were available for the start of the next school year. Anyone in Bath up for lending a hand there let me know!

 

Ive also been asked if I know anyone who would support the Christmas festivities at HTL. Every year they learn carols and go out into the community (predominantly Christian) and sing carols, invite them to the Christmas service and then feed everyone. Im told that they need around £400 for this!

 

With the work I do with BMWEC may of the needy projects are on a huge scale and the most pressing priorities are Kwel Qa Baung, in the region of £20,000 per year, still without a funder; HTL boarding house (£1000.00 per year to replace the funder whose term expires in December and is unable to renew) and a donor for the Post 10programs at HTL and TMK – anyone who works for a large company which has a global citizen policy (or whatever pc term they choose to apply) please forward details on. Ive also been working with an intern (from my grade xii class) on how to put together proposals and hes just about finished one for food for a high school (Kwel Qa Baung) which will be sent out net week to organisations who have a mission to provide meals for school children.

 

I do hate the side of my job which spends so much time looking at figures and budgets and proposals. It is not exactly satisfying, neither is it enjoyable, unlike the teaching. However what is worse is the feeling that things are moving ow so slowly in regard to looking for new donors to fund projects which are in desperate need of money and children who need to eat!

The last part of the weeks blog (late I know) will be tomorrow and will focus on the high points of the first semester, the children and the amazing changes which ive been privileged to have been part of and in.

 

Part 5: The children

Theres many terms to describe the group of people who I work with. Some call them economic migrants, others would say refugees, some (technical people) say stateless, undocumented children, the school I work for proudly proclaims to be for internally displaced people (even though it is not in Burma!). I frequently get into trouble for using the wrong term with the wrong group of people so let me describe them and ill let you make up your own minds.

 

For 60 years there has been a civil war in Burma between the ethnic minorities and the government. In 1990 there was an election and the NLD was voted into power howeve the ruling military decided they didnt want to hand ovr power and until this day they have kept the democratically elected leader under house arrest (You’ve probably seen that bit on the news, shes called Aung San Sui Kyi and shes a noble peace prize winner!)

 

You many wonder why so many have fled Burma to neighbouring countries. A few days ago I mentioned about Rambo being pretty accurate. Unfortunately that is no exaggeration. The families of the children I teach have often been forced to move, seen their rice paddies confiscated and their homes burned. Those who are still living in villages often have to pay three lots of tax; one to the government, one to the governments friends and one to the ‘freedom soldiers’ who are fighting for THEM!

 

I was having lunch with one fo my soldiers recently and asked him what he wanted to do, he wants to return to his village but he knows that he risks being forced into the army. His um told him to flee and not come back to avoid being press ganged into the local militia. He smiled at that. Hes so quiet and often scowls in class but just now and again he quirks his lip and that melts me, as I know ive brought a little happiness into his life.

 

One of the girls in my class is the daughter of a lieutenant in the freedom army. Shes here to learn how to teach as where she is from most of the children don’t have education. There are no teaches and the government will not spend any money on schools. Even where children do get education, the teachers and school have to be supported by the parents of the children, most never receive outside help.

 

Ive focused here mostly on education, but I could equally have looked at the mutilations, killings, rape or beatings that the children have witnessed, and in some cases endured. Burma is also the leading country in number of live landmines and so it should come of no surprise to hear that there are many victims on this side of the border with missing limbs or artificial replacements.

 

The question of what to call these people to me is a simple one, they are friends, in need, but friends. The smiles on their faces warms me and whenever I feel a little down or tired all I need to do is look at one of them and im instantly revived.

 

I hope that sheds a little light on why im here and on why I love these children so much. If you are Christian, Id ask you to join me in prayer for them, and petition God for more love in their lives. They’ve had to endure so much at such a young age and yes they still constantly smile, and yet talking to some they also have a deep sorrow, one that can only be healed with love.

P4: Perseverance, Power, Prayer and Purpose

Last Sunday I was asked if I would preach at the English service of the Baptist church so this morning I did. Finding a topic was easy, in fact the Holy Spirit had given me the topic before I even received the invitation! (about 2 hours before)

 

The topic was easy – the spiritual fire of God within us, or in more memorable terms: Perseverance, Power, Prayer and Purpose/Passing-it-on. Im indebted to Jonathon for his explanation of why we use ‘hooks’ (so that we remember the sermon further than the car door!) and Rupert too for little bits which I inevitably stole from past sermons.

 

The reasons this was so easy is because a battle I have faced recently is keeping the spirit alive in me, when all im doing is serving. Strange you might think, as, being a Christian, im called to serve. Agreed, but a problem can arise when all we are doing is ‘wearing the cloak of endless serving’ and forgetting that God should be the reason for the serving, the strength we need to serve, and the reason we share with others.

 

The second of those points I find easy, especially when cooking at 3.30 am after 3 hours sleep, I have no strength and can ONLY rely on Gods, but also sharing Gods love with others, verbally as well as practically can be a challenge. I know I certainly struggled with that over the last few weeks. Usually I chat to people easily about God, but while ive been tired ive tended to accept these opportunities a little less.

 

Holiday time I here though and, while im still not exactly relaxing on a beach, I am taking a lot more time to fan those spiritual gifts within me and learn more about my saviour, Jesus Christ. Its strange that, compared to many other spiritual battles ive faced, this has been a lot less painful, but ultimately is so much more dangerous, however now, when I look around (with only a hundred things going through my mind instead of a thousand) I can see Gods glory and design in so many ways and im really reinvigorated and happy that I am here to serve God and share his love with those that I meet.

 

After preaching this morning I went to the Karen service (I love listening to the Karen songs and joining in with those that ive learnt) and was also drawn towards the book of Ruth. WOW! For someone who gave up so much to go and serve in a foreign land, boy was she rewarded. But I shouldn’t be surprised I suppose, as that is the exact message that Jesus gives us in Mark 10: 29-31.

 

Ill update again tomorrow with more about the actual people I live with – the Karen and how they approach life with nothing but a smile!

Blog Week 3: The Schools

Last few weeks have been quite challenging personally, working out what to do next semester. A number of things have come up and it is now decided that I will be teaching at Hsa Thoo Lei and working with BMWEC on funding. The curricula has now been developed at Thoo Mwe Khee and so I have handed the whole thing over to Shirley and Peacefully to manage. Hopefully they will continue to run the school well and the students, who have learnt so much in such a short space of time, will continue to develop educationally and spiritually.

 

One school which really breaks my heart is Kwel Qa Baung. There umbrella organisation, Help Without Frontiers, stopped their funding in February this year over an argument between staff at HWF and the chairman. I could write pages on how this is unreasonable and cruel and hurts the children who the organisation are supposedly their to protect but I wont. Currently they are surviving on emergency funding which means rent, transport and 1,000B per teacher is paid for by World Education, an NGO working on the border. But it has now been 7 months and they are not really any closer to finding a long term donor who will support the 420 children there! This continues to be the biggest and most challenging task that I work on with BMWEC.

 

On a positive note some of the schools have found new donors for the next 18 months so the pressure is off their budgets.

 

Schools need (relatively) little to run and it is difficult to see why it is so hard to fund donors, although many potential people I have tried recently have responded with the inevitable ‘not in this financial climate’ response. The worldwide recession is truly world wide and hits the people who have the least.

 

We did hold training for some teachers recently and I was really happy tp be able to sit and chat to one from the IDP area (area in Burma where villagers have escaped to after forced relocation by the Burmese army). The money that the CU at Bath raised helped to give each teacher a 1000B stipend. Prior to this they had received nothing for two years. They were so happy that someone had taken the time to try and give them something and were really looking forward to being able to feed their families properly without replying on charity from the parents of the children who they teach.

 

There is still a little money left from the CU and so I’m hoping to give them all a second pay check in December. 1000B is only £20, and for three months work this is ridiculously little, whether looking at the process in Thailand or the UK! What really amazes me is that even after two years without a single baht salary, they were all still teaching, giving their all to try and help the next generation. Would the teachers in the UK still be teaching if they hadn’t been paid for two years?

 

Teaching despite not being paid is not just a phenonemum is the 13 IDP schools. Many schools up and down the border often go for a month or two without wages as the donors don’t pay on time, the ate changes or there is simply no donor, as at KQB and yet the children never go without education.